Politics of Feelings

I don't get the concept behind it, so I sit here with my hand to my chin like wise old men do when playing chess. As I try to evaluate the state of things, like somehow my awakening will somehow stir up movement in a generation silenced out of fear. Fear that if they say how they feel that they'll get hurt by a government trained to make the rich richer; or the one you love being intimidated by your feelings and you end up losing because of the lack of reciprocity. So it's a game this life thing; and as much as I try to keep it real I find myself staying quiet when I really wanna speak. Like when I wanna tell her how I feel, and based on the knowledge of her own feelings I stay muted when I really wanna turn up the volume so that what I have to say is heard by her. But the volume of my words into the mass of your emotions doesn't equate the density of an us. So I sit silenced marinating in the feelings I have to keep bottled up in this limited space and venting it in a direction that my kite is forced to fly in. And I sit here watching as it loses ascension

Royalty

They try to tell me that because I don't own a palace with servants that feel honored to wipe my ass, that somehow I'm not a queen. Telling me that because I don't have a castle on a hill, that my life is just a minor thrill. Not valued much. You're telling me that because I don't have a crown made of the finest jewels that the capacity of my thought processes are inferior.
But as I grab this microphone and situate my speakers at the four corners of the earth I tell them, that wherever I sit that's my throne and in it I rule my destiny. I tell them that I don't need a tangible crown because what I have is more salubrious and that's a mind that doesn't conform to your beliefs.
So you can take your theory of royalty and shove it up your royal asshole!!!

REVOLT

I'm simple and so they mistake my simplicity for simple minded
But I'm on a mission to be that reminder
That anything is possible
So as this waste matter accumulates into feces
I give u a piece of me
To make into manure to feed a nation starving for truth

What's my password?

As I try to gain access through answering the key question of what's my password?
I entered BEAUTY and they said that I was incorrect because indeed the answer was COMPLEXITY
And I guess that's the only way to gain access to my thought processes
Cuz beauty just doesn't define me.

2:25am

REALITY... seems like fragments of a nightmare that hosts my sub-conscious nights every so often
Like sometimes I have to pinch myself to see if I'm really alive
Because as much as I don't chase tangible wealth
I crave happiness by my theory entails love, comfort and security
But my security is constantly challenged when things like these surface
Like forms that requires copies of me
As if I'm a citizen of somewhere
All I am is a place of birth and a temporary stay
Resident of life and a citizen of hope
Reality is something I always try to give
But it seems like I just can't win
When I am a recipient

Contacts

12:21am...
I sat there on a surface that's been robbed off the backs of innocent animals
But that's not the thoughts that surface in this complex mind of mine
I think of the direction my life is going
And how is it that I value love more than material gain?
I sit and ponder on past relationships gone bad
The times I've made the significant other signify hurt and lost
Because they never seem to meet the need of my obscure wants
So I sit here watching the leaves change
Thinking how the seasons make no changes
Because the o-zone is fucked up
And we're pondering on a theory that we ourselves created the hypothesis and proof
So I sit here at what is now 12:26 am
Five minutes after the initiation of this blog
As I look through this phonebook, I see no name that will stimulate my thought processes

Opinions...

it mends, breaks and alters mood swings
I sometimes sit and ponder on its effects
How's it that we value what others think of us so highly?
As if what they say is the standing system of laws

I break away from all the chains u try to bind me in
And awake to a daybreak not confounded to your views of me
Because I rule my own destiny
And in this path I chose to say FUCK YOU!!!

INTRODUCTION

Met her the first time like a mirror that spoke back
It had a voice, and opinions that differed from mine,
But I can see right through her lies
Right through her pretenses
Because she is me
She stares spontaneously
Smiles in between silent pauses
And the glimpses causes...
My heart to flutter
Even though there's no attraction
So her fingernails become my distraction
As we sat across from eachother, drinking cups of coffee
What an introduction

FROZEN

on the FDR. LUCKY SHOT I guess

Founding Mothers

Somehow I got trapped in the clause of an amendment to your constitution
So like a rebel I escape to get out of all your boxes
You tried to make me a part of your production of industrial clones
I was trying to gain approval from you
Sorry that I have a brain to decipher between what's good for me and what's toxic
Sorry I'm not suicidal to take u in large doses
Big enough to kill a whole nation
It's not really my style
So I took u in increments that made me immune to you
I'm no longer afraid to be in your presence
Because you no longer affect me
So as I sign this bill, in order to counter the previous statute
I, Tishka Dupera hereby denounce you

...

Sometimes I wanna seize in the frame of my thoughts
And be shuttled to the unknown
become the look to, for the hopeless
As my purpose in life

COMPLEXITY

Dreams that never become reality
Just torrid nightmares which is my present state
I dreamt about a little thing called happiness
Only to wake up to gloom
I try to stay positive
But the negative always seem to drag me to the left of zero
Life is like algebra
And I can't keep up with the ever changing X

X is always the unkown
But I seem to be stuck in the Y's

Never understanding human actions and reactions
How's it that they expect so much
Yet they contribute nothing
It's like expecting a tax return without paying taxes
It's dumb


The complexity of life, is due to our own complicated nature

Higher Heights

Stacy

TIME

You said you needed to feel the rhythm of my thoughts against your eardrum
As I stimulated every sensual nerve on ur anatomy
I was aggressively pulled as if I was the oxygen that u lost for 6mins and 29secs
I made a vow between ur arms and my heart to draw nigh everytime I got too warped in the isms and schisms of this life
Beauty transluted a light more radiant and genuine than that of the sun
Because it was ur eyes, that lit up my world
Providing me with 24 hours of daylight
It was a time of love, and I'm afraid the season changed

THE NOW

Same old feeling after the intensity ended.
I'm sick of writing poetry over situations that aren't quite poetic
Just hectic
Leading me to wanna change my frame of mind and the way I treat the attractor
Nothing's quite magnetic
Just problematic to the conditions of these unstable emotions of mine
I'm trying to understand the thought processes of these individuals but I seem to always end up in a heavier dilemma.
THE NOW is me getting back to the art scene
It's the inspiration through nature and unconfused situations
So I ask you to come and take a walk with me through the forest of unconventional beauty
Where the only thing you'll find there is yourself
Let's frame frames
THE NOW is re-realization

GENDER

She consumed me with her laughter,
did u see her voice melt the wax in my ear and spew out like lava from a volcano
cuz she blew my mind
Love knows no race, sex or social status
Love wasn't biased when it saw that she lived 900miles away
Love knew not that I knew not how to love
It just gave her to me, and along the way we learned to love each other
Her is female, beauty, unconsumed
And I had no other choice but to fall.

artistic journeys

My hands produce art, it draws, it molds and writes
My feet walk to places where my eyes see beauty
My hands then replicates it from my mind's comprehension
To my hands execution.
My hands, feet and mind is traveling on a journey
I'll let these two parts go, if you'll travel with me
As I offer you this penny

Deftones

The tone of ur lies as you try to coax me into following you down a path that ends at a tunnel off sewage rats, and a dead end. Tried to go back to the place where this whole thing begun, and as I strolled I realized that all this started before my conception and has been going on forever.
So I ask who must take this blame? So I've just purposely become def to the tone of every lie that slips off your (society's) lips.

INSPIRATION

i DRAW INSPIRATION FROM EVERY DIRECTION.
Direction 1:
#2:
#3:
#4:

#5:
#6:

Call Back

I’m trying to understand what it is that we’ve somehow become trapped in, a three way love affair where I could never win because I’m just the side chick just like a faithful disciple listening to a voice that’s concocted in my own head, telling me that there’s hope. Holding on to an image not realizing that the reality has become a fantasy that I try to pass off as real. Because I’m still sitting here hoping for a change, hoping that I could be your number one, instead of a replacement that gets substituted every full moon, no one quite sticks but it seems to always be the same rotation just a different object every month. I can’t be just another entry in your book of too many options and everyone’s just a proxy nothing you really need. And that bothers me because I can’t just be a stand-in for you I have to be the archetype or nothing at all, but you wanna treat me the way Bush treated the no kid left behind policy when he fed us with his weapons of mass deception telling us something without providing tangible evidence. Didn’t the American people see that all his reasons was based on mark-ups of a theory, telling me that they have nuclear armaments. I say fuck the system and their lies, so what if I choose not to respect the american policy or the fact that I’ve divulged myself in your analytical lies. I say it’s time that I QUIT, to wake up from where u lied.

Redirection

See the initial plan was to dedicate these blogs to art as it pertains to fashion, then somewhere in queue I re-routed to a new destination, which isn't quite so final. And here's where I am, the place where I realized that people are oblivious to what's going on in the world. We turn stations when the news come on, pass newspapers for fashion magazines and the gossip colums, turn to page 23 in the daily news to read your horoscope, and never took the time to see that soldiers are dying in Iraq; that there are seven foot pythons in New York's apt building with heads popping up in toilet bowls. That the economy is failing, gas prices are raising, Milk is now $4.19 per gallon, the twister on the KFC menu is now $0.20 cents more. Really though when did we get so cold? We stopped caring about our neighbours, we don't feel for others, just ourselves. I guess I got redirected when I realized that a 14 year old boy is suicidal. Where will your wake up call alarm sound from?

MTA Billbooard

This is how they're advertising the benefits of health insurance.

Saturday

So after the presentation in my advertising and promotion class, the creative Johannes and I decided to head to american apparel where I purchased a banana yellow v-neck sweater. Wearing a white Sailor button up teamed with a chocolate and navy cardigan, along with solid dark blue skinny jeans, navy ferragamo booties, and a maroon vintage leather bomber. Her wearing a brown vintage bomber lined with an Obey Propoganda hoodie, stone-washed denim, and laced up rugged beat-up boots. For this blog she's my model.

what happened to the human form?

Isn;t it suppose to be the most beautiful beautiful work of art? So I decided to use myself as a canvas

colonial living

For some reason this house is very comforting to me. I pass here everyday even though I end up walking an extra block.

Photography in motion

Everything's still, excluding her, but she's captured while everything else is a blur.

THE REVOLUTIONIST

I remember the first time I heard about Saul Williams, I thought what a radical, then I started researching his work, and realized how versatile he is.
I started respecting him as a poet, and then I fell in love with his appreciation for black ppl, and his laid back in ur face attitude.
If you don't know his work u might've heard him on Kanye's College Dropout "Never let you Down" the dude shouting on the outro

INDIVIDUALS! in a time of global clones

Whatever happened to that thing called individuality?
Instead I see you copying what you see on T.V
Come on and follow me to a world of spontaneity
Where you can let go and let your mind go free
Will you take a walk with me?

Tourists

to this quote on quote Fashion thing, they appear on the scene when Kelis made my short-do fly, when Pharell made skateboarding cool, when Kelis started rocking that canary yellow, where the fuck did they come from. What about icons like Madonna? Like Prince's off-key looks; like Audrey Hepburn's classic look. Like Iekeliene's retro punk look? They constantly pretend as if they know the history of this fashion thing when in reality they're just tourists, visiting and taking pictures, the only icons they know is the one's on the cover of magazine's which they don't read, all they know is what they see on t.v not behind the scenes man this shit annoys me.